Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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