Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
