Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
