...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
