people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Randomize
