I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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