Sponge bath it is.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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