I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
my vag is so smooth its legendary
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
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