It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
