whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
