Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Randomize
