Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
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