Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
