If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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