Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
