So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Redeem this text for a blowjob
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
