I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Randomize
