okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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