That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
