Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
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He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
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Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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