Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
