i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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