Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
