Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
