I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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