i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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