Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
if only i could text you this smell
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
