the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
