just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize