There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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