last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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