my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
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