it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
