HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
she looked like the before picture.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
