So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
