my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize