i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Don't EVER smell your tampon
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God gave him joint rollers for hands
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize