i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
