just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize