"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
only if we run a train.
done.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize