He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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