I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
