well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
