I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Randomize
