Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
