He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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