Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Randomize
