I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
