Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Randomize
