ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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