More tranny stories later!
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
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She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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