Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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