It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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