I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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